Thursday, May 21, 2015

When Your Care Partner Is in Denial About Your Kidney Disease

If you live with kidney disease, you’re already familiar with the symptoms and feelings it can cause for you. But the emotional side effects you may have experienced since diagnosis — fear, anger, sadness, denial — could be felt by your dialysis care partner, too.

Your care partner may fear losing you, or losing the quality of life you both enjoyed before you needed dialysis. Sometimes care partners of dialysis patients use denial as a way to protect themselves from a reality they’re not yet ready to accept.

People may be in denial about anything that makes them feel vulnerable or threatens their sense of control. Your care partner may be afraid of losing you, or may fear the lifestyle change that results from your treatments, whether you do in-center hemodialysis, home hemodialysis (HHD) or peritoneal dialysis (PD). By practicing denial, your care partner is temporarily insulating himself or herself against something that’s sorrowful or daunting to think about at the moment.

There is a time when denial can actually be a healthy coping mechanism to adjust to bad news. Your care partner may need several days or weeks to process the facts about your CKD and how your lives will change as a result. As time goes on, your partner may begin to absorb the reality of the situation and approach it more rationally. However, if denial continues after a prolonged period, it can paralyze a person when action is necessary, especially when a loved one is sick and needs treatment.

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